6 Steps for Change
Creating change can be hard - even when you don’t like where you are now and everything in you is screaming, “There is something better for me!”
I get it because I’ve been there. I was dead inside, a shell of a person. I knew what I was doing wasn’t working- I was doughy, listless, unethused, apathic. All the things no one would have ever described me as at 16, 22, 27, 34. At 16 I was sparkly, at 22 I was curious, at 27 I was courageous, at 34 I was a charasmatic leader, so WTF happened to that woman who was a life-liver?! One answer: DEAD WEIGHT.
In this post, I’ll share with you the 6 key actions I took to drop that dead weight and get my groove back, for reals.
Here’s the scene: I was earning well over six figures at a Fortune 500 company, and I had been promoted and chosen to do special kick-a$$ assingments over the years. I was in a committed, and loving relationship with my best friend (who is a f*cking hilarious genius, btw). We lived in a super-educated, diverse, liberal (does’t need to be important to you, but is important to me) part of the city and I was teaching at one of the best yoga studios in the Midwest. And it was GREAT, for a few years. But then, it stayed the SAME, for years….and well, I didn’t. I was ready to get after the life I had always envisioned for myself- being an entrepreneur, traveling and living internationally again, having a feeling of FREEDOM and VITALITY.
How the hell was I going to get from here to there? Well, I’m embarrassed to say it took me years of inaction, which caused me some pretty serious depression, tons of fretting and anxiety, lots of complaining and asking everyone else what I should do, but then it hit me, it just hit. I couldn’t ignore the pull to completely change my life. My health depended on it. So, here’s what I did, and guess what? IT WORKED and it will work for you too.
If this sounds familiar, you’re in the right place. Here we go!
Step 1: Get clear. The reason you feel listless and stuck is something is in your life that is not in alignment with who you are anymore because you are a dynamic force that has GROWN. That job may have been a perfect fit for you 3 years ago, but now going in gives you a stomach ache. That boyfriend may have had a Harley (insert butterflies), but now you are uneasy around his lack of drive, pun intended 😜. That house in the ‘burbs may have looked dreamy, but now it feels like a noose and your neighbors are boring. You get it. So, my friend, what is IT? Here’s a secret…..IT can be EVERYTHING. No shame here. Once you identify what is soul-crushing you, I love to use the brain-dump method, move on to…
Step 2: Evaluate. Once you are clear on what has a vice on your vitality, you need to evaluate: is this something that is important to me that I am willing to do some work to change? Or, is this something that is just hanging around because I’ve been too clouded/scared/not-sure-of-how to get rid of it? I love to use my core values and my vision to help me here. Either way, you will need to…
Step 3: Prep your mind. Either you’ve decided this thing/person/situation is important to you AND it has the ability to be something you align with in the future, OR you’ve decided that your mind-grapes and your heart-space will be better occupied on something new. In any event, you will need to prep yourself by doing some thought-work and mindset exercises so you can….
Step 4: Take action. Messy, sweaty, teary, f*#king ACTION. Take it. Remember, this blog post is about change, so you are COMMITTED to either a) changing your current stressor some way (make sure to give yourself a deadline to see improvements) ex: have a tough conversation with your boss, create some goals with Harley-man, redecorate your house OR b) say a grateful good-bye and sell that house and move to Columbia. After the hard stuff….
Step 5: Celebrate YOU. I’m serious, creating change is sometimes terrifying and hard, but YOU CAN DO HARD THINGS, thanks Glennon Doyle💖 Take yourself out for a glass of expensive champagne, invite your friends over for a bonfire and throw in all your s*it, get yourself a new skin-care routine, book that trip. SIT IN YOUR COURAGEOUSNESS, feel it, really feel it. You did this, you faced adversity, emotions, scary people, and you were a stand for YOU. Be proud. The celebration here isn’t all about fun, it will help to rewire your brain for the next time you have to make a tough change. Really and truly celebrating yourself will imprint on your mind & soul, you’ll know you have your own back and that knowledge is as good as gold! Lastly…
Step 6: Create. Feel how good it feels to create from a blank slate. Journal, meditate, walk, cook, dance, pray, draw. Create what you want next in that space. Get in touch with what you wanted as a kid-those desires are in us for a reason, and most of them never go away. We can use them as a guiding light to bring us closer to home, our wildest dreams, and ultimately, ourselves. ❤
I want you and every woman out there to live beyond her wildest dreams. If you’re ready to ditch the script, set aside the drama and DIVE IN, then let’s set up a free 15-minute coffee chat to see how The Freedom Sessions can support you! Email hello@thefreedom-sessions.com to schedule your spot now ✨
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